This page is undergoing some editing, as our rating system goes under changes. Excuse our dust.

Here at the Serious Nerd, we review things. This involves a rating and scoring system. Also, dur de dur. But in all seriousness, we thought our ratings might be a bit vague. So here’s an overview.

SCORING:

This is the system we use when we review anything. We use a percentage system of 0 to 100; and, we use specific categories for specific ratings. We also rate based on specific categories depending on the item.

Scoring:

0 (Horrifying)- The thing being reviewed is depressingly horrifying. When we score something like this, it is a vile, horrifying waste of your time and affection and should be left to die in its own fluids. Seriously, we had to get that graphic to describe the badness. Don’t make us draw a picture.

10 (Pure Bad)- The thing being reviewed is just pure bad. It no doubt made itself like this on purpose. Either this is an inside joke, or just something that was thrown together in a lab by an evil scientist who dislikes people.

20 (Intolerable)- The thing be reviewed is intolerable. They tried to make this thing good… for about 2 seconds. Let’s hope for no sequel.

30 (Barely Tolerable)- The thing being reviewed is barely tolerable. Whoever made it forgot they were making a quality product and just shipped it to China. Then they filled it with lead and did who knows what with it.

40 (Tolerable)- The thing being reviewed is tolerable. If you were forced to use whatever the product was, you would be angry and annoyed, but you wouldn’t be left with tragic, scarring memories of horrible quality.

50 (Average)- The thing being reviewed is average. It’s just something you found in the bargain bin that no one ever really bought. It’s like getting a C- on your report card. Sure it’s technically acceptable, but borderline failure.

60 (Okay)- The thing being reviewed is okay. It may be worth a buy, but only for one or two things. Overall, the package is nothing groundbreaking or special. Only for fans of the particular series or genre.
70 (Good/Interesting)- The thing being reviewed is interesting. It’s not great, but it’s not too average either. It has some things that make it stand out, but it’s not worth a purchase if you don’t like the product’s ideas. For example; if a shooting video game is this score, but you don’t like shooting games, you probably won’t like this. If it was an 100, you would buy it no matter what. But with this score, you simply should disregard it.

80 (Great)- The thing being reviewed is pretty good. It’s got a flaw or two, but there’s still a lot of good things that make the product worth it.

90 (Incredible)- The thing being reviewed is really, really good. As with most things, it has imperfections, but it only takes you away for a very short time if anything. Then you just forget about it and love it for what it has.

100 (Perfect)- This thing is perfect. On a list, this thing is only a bit less divine then your god, if applicable.

Categories:

What criteria we use to rate games. We separate our 100% score based on each one of these, giving it a 0-10 and adding the result. For example, a game with a bad story and price can drag down a game with great graphics, audio and replayability. We score each category like so;

0- This category is strongly lacking, or is not present at all.

5- This category is average.

10- This category is outstanding.

For Games:

UNDER CONSTRUCTION

For Books:

Story or Book Idea:

Does the story or book idea keep you hooked? Would you read it and stay interested, or be interested at all?

Readability:

Is the language clear and understandable? Is the language or text readable? Does the text flow well?

Length:

Is the book really long, with lots of dragging and boring moments, really long with an interesting story throughout, or is it too short?

Price:

Is the book over or under priced for its size and content quality?

For Foods:

Taste:

Are their some common, non exotic flavors that make it instantly likeable? Does the exoticness of the food make it more interesting or detract from it?

Quality:

Is the food good for you? Is it made to not degrade in taste while it’s still in your mouth? Does it make you feel ill or have side effects? Does it have aesthetic effects on you, intended or not, like a discolored tongue?

Price:

Does the food’s quality and quantity match its price? Is the bag full enough to justify its price?

For Movies or TV Shows:

Movie or TV Show Idea:

Does the movie or show keep you interested? Is it unique? Does it flow well with future sequels or episodes?

Looks:

If the movie or TV show is animated, is it good quality? Does it stay constantly the same quality or style, if it’s not intended to change for movie effect? If the movie or TV Show is filmed, is the camera good; focused, non-shaky and used at good angles?

Audio:

Does the movie or TV show sound good? Does it enhance the viewing experience or detract or distract from it?

Length:

Does the movie or TV show drag out for too long, or do you wish it could be longer?

RATING:

This system applies to Internet Games only, where the ESRB has no rating of content.

OVERALL:

Rated Everyone - All Ages

Rated Tween - 10 +

Rated Teen - 12 +

Rated Mature - 14 +

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LANGUAGE:

Mild Language - Mean words like “Idiot” and “Buttface” are present

Language - Some mild swear words are present

Strong Language - Hateful words and excessive swearing and/or strong swears are present

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BLOOD AND GORE:

Mild Blood - A small bit of blood is present

Blood - Blood is present

Excessive Blood - A huge amount of blood is present

Gore - Body parts are sliced/shot off

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WEAPON VIOLENCE:

Mild Weapon Violence - Weapons are used, but they don’t affect the victim in a very violent way at all

Weapon Violence - Weapons are commonly used, and they may sometimes affect the victim in a violent way

Strong Weapon Violence - Weapons are commonly used, and they always affect the victim in a very violent way

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FIGHTING:

Mild Fighting - Characters in the game might sometimes punch or kick, but it’s not the main part of the game, and/or it does not affect the victim in a violent way

Fighting - Characters in the game fight each other often, and it may sometimes affect the victim in a violent way

Violent Fighting - Characters in the game fight constantly, and victims are affected in very violent ways.

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VEHICLE VIOLENCE:

Mild Vehicle Violence - Car crashes in a cartoonish way, etc.

Vehicle Violence - Tanks and the like are used to fight in this game

Reckless Driving - Destroy your vehicle through irresponsible driving

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REALISTIC VIOLENCE:

Semi-Realistic Violence - The violence in this game could be committed in real life, but it’s not very likely to happen

Realistic Violence - The violence in this game could be committed in real life, but chances are, it’s not going to happen

Very Realistic Violence - The violence in this game could easily be committed in real life, in fact the violence might be something that’s happening somewhere in the world right now.

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HUMOR:

 

Potty Humor - Farting and burping types of jokes are present

 

Malicious Humor - The humor in this game was obviously intended to make fun of someone in a mean way

 

Twisted Humor - Humor that makes you laugh through extreme violence or other twisted means

 

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SEX:

 

Sex Jokes - Exactly what it says

 

Suggestive Images - A picture of something that looks like something sexual, but in reality it probably isn’t

 

Partial Nudity - People in their underwear.

 

Nudity - Yup. Porn. I won’t feature any internet game with nudity in it, so don’t worry. I just put this here to complete the list